In my last post, I talked about how relationships are like cars in that both need proper maintenance to keep in top shape. Today, I want to give you a handy tool that I think makes a huge difference in maintaining a good relationship. It’s no secret that I love Dr. John Gottman’s work. I reference his books and ideas quite often. This tool is one of his gems I find myself talking to couples about frequently. In his years of studying many different couples, he has found that t

If you've ever owned a car, you know it takes a lot of maintenance. You have to fill it up with gas, make sure the tires have enough air, change the oil, go to scheduled mileage appointments, and occasionally go to a car wash. For owners of vintage vehicles, even more maintenance is necessary to keep those cars in top shape. Brand new cars don't take too much work at first, but the older they get, the more work they need. You should see where I'm going with this analogy. Main

It’s no secret that having a baby changes, well, everything. You have many more responsibilities and time gets away from you much easier. With a child taking up most of that time, you have less and less time for your partner. That inevitably means less time for sex. If this sounds familiar, I have a few suggestions below that might help you find that spark again: Take advantage of free moments Now that you have a little one who needs you most of the day and even at night, you

‘Tis the season for engagement Fa la la la la, la la la la! Boutonnieres and flower arrangements Fa la la la la, la la la la! Rented tuxes, bridesmaids dresses Fa la la, la la la, la la la! Time to discuss marital stresses Fa la la la la, la la la la! Alright, I’m in a silly mood today, thus my little song for you about premarital counseling. On a more serious note, did you know in a study about marital satisfaction, the couples who completed some sort of marriage preparation

Do you make New Year’s resolutions? If so, do you keep them? According to a study done in 2014 by the University of Scranton*, only about 8% of Americans were successful in accomplishing their resolutions last year. Many people resolve to do things better when the new year rolls around, but quickly abandon their ideas and fall into the same comfortable patterns they have created. Why do so many resolutions fail? There are multiple reasons, but a main one is that there is ofte

With the holidays now upon us, you’ve no doubt noticed the increased number of commercials for cars, jewelry, toys, and things that you NEED to buy this gift-giving season. Many of us get sucked into these traps and believe that if we give or receive these things that happiness will follow. This may be true…but only temporarily. Kids are especially susceptible to the lure of stuff during the holiday. I would like to share with you a few ways you can make sure to raise your ch

Let’s be honest. Many people dread the holidays because of their family. Everyone has at least one family member who drives you crazy when you spend more than 20 minutes together. And the holidays are usually the one time during the year where you have to spend an extended amount of time in close proximity. Now, I’m not here to tell you that you have to get along with everyone in your family – that’s probably unrealistic. However, you can enjoy your holiday celebrations in sp

With Thanksgiving just around the corner, I am dedicating this blog post to couples looking for different ways to show gratitude for their partners. This post also serves as a reminder that no matter how you do it, showing appreciation for your partner is a necessary part of keeping your relationship healthy. Without regular displays of gratitude, your "love bank" does not gain any deposits (let alone interest!). Continuing to only take withdrawals from this bank will inevita

Hey, perfectionists who also happen to be parents: I’m calling you out. Do you often question your abilities as a parent? Do you think you should be doing something better or different with your kids? Well, stop it. I’m here to tell you that it’s unlikely you’re ever going to be perfect at ANYTHING, especially parenting. Being a recovering perfectionist myself, I’m continuing to learn this lesson along with you. “Good enough” is the new “perfect” and I hope I can help you see

Picture this: a frazzled mom picks up her toddler and five-year-old from daycare after a long day at work. On the way home, the five-year-old begins to scream about being hungry and wanting dinner NOW! The toddler starts to cry shortly after and joins in about being hungry. With 20 minutes still left in the ride home, the mom reaches her breaking point and screams back, "Fine! We're going to McDonald's!" and pulls into the nearest drive-through to get a couple of Happy Meals,